I have lost control of my emotions yet again. I don’t know if I’m anxious or manic, although I suspect it’s a bit of both. I had 4 hours of sleep last night in two separate bits, one for 3 hours and one for 1 hour. I gave in at 4:30 and just got up.
My husband is working wicked amounts of overtime and I’m trying to make sure that I’m sending him out the door with good healthy meals to keep him going. I’m surviving on cereal and fruit, but I will find a way to feed my husband. He’s the only one in this house with a job, he deserves to eat. So, I have a small pork tenderloin in the crockpot and I’m going to make pulled pork sandwiches for him to take along. MIL looks in the crockpot, and knowing the answer, asks me what I used to season the pork. “Nothing” I said. And I got the shittiest sounding “oh” I have heard for awhile and an eyeroll. “I would have put seasoning on it” she said. Now I’m boiling mad inside and with great effort I look at her, smile and say “I know, I’m going to be using barbeque and chipotle sauce later”. She comes back with “I still would have seasoned it.” “I know” I say and say I’m going to go lay down with hubby who didn’t sleep enough last night either and is napping before he has to go to work (second shift). But, I don’t want to disturb him so I came back to the living room.
Thankfully, MIL seems to be retreating to her bedroom and I will be going straight to mine as soon as hubby leaves.
This all comes down to her 1) not having the control anymore that she used to have at her home before she moved in with us and 2) making sure her baby has the best of everything, which apparently means sprinkling some Mrs. Dash on the pork loin.
So, I’m on my second Ativan of the day. After hubby goes to work I will go to our bedroom and get some serious alone time in.
For now, I think I’m going to do some hard core coloring, because I just don’t have to focus to do much else.