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I started this post two weeks ago, got distracted and abandoned it. But facebook’s landscape this morning has me dusting it off.
Why does my dog’s new hairstyle get 50 likes and a ton of comments about how cute he is and my post about being so low I can’t function gets nothing?
I used to be a prolific “Facebooker”. I was online all day and would check in constantly. I “liked” posts for recipes and jokes, took the silly quizzes, posted pictures of vacations, and of course, the required pics of my animals.
As my mental illnesses have worsened over the last few years, my “facebooking” has slowed down considerably. Now, I mostly keep my account to watch out for my stepchildren and nephews.
But, I usually do a quick run through my wall in the morning just to see what people are talking about.
And today, they are talking about guns.
Except, they aren’t actually talking about guns. They are posting memes, put together by someone else, taking polarizing positions one way or the other regarding the President’s speech yesterday.
And I have a real problem with that. Posting a meme like that tells me that you are not articulate enough to tell me what your position actually is. You just want me to know that you love or hate guns or the President or whatever. But nothing is ever that easy. Rarely is someone’s position on an issue strictly white or black. Shades of gray exist everywhere and memes don’t allow for those shades of gray.
If you are going to post something like that, elaborate. I always thought that social media would be a great tool for society to share opinions, organize and make social change. Instead it has sunk to the lowest common denominator. Pictures of dogs and dinner and cats and drunk people litter my wall daily. If there are important conversations taking place, I have yet to find them. And if I try to start one of those conversations, I am usually met with crickets.
WordPress has almost completely replaced social media for me. I don’t go to Twitter at all anymore, I don’t even post my blog there. I don’t share my blog to facebook because I need to maintain some anonymity until the disability situation shakes out one way or the other. If I want to have a conversation, this is the place.
The group therapy situation of WordPress cannot be understated either. If things get bad, I can come here and get it out. Usually I get feedback, sometimes I don’t, but *crosses fingers* I haven’t attracted trolls yet. Facebook is useless for this because I’m posting something serious and personal and that just isn’t what facebook is for.
If it can’t be said with a pic of my dog, it’s not worth saying on facebook.
I won’t be giving up my candy crush anytime soon though 😉
morgueticiaatoms said:
Write something really asinine, like your dog’s farts smell like Skittles.
You will get a hundred likes.
Throw in a pic of the dog with Skittles dropping at its feet, you will get a thousand.
Social media, big no for me. I quit wading in the psychologically kiddie pool a long time ago, don’t wanna go back )
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HMJonesWrites said:
Reblogged this on H.M. Jones and commented:
Loved this article on what Facebook really is.
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Leslie said:
Thank you. That’s very kind of you to share.
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HMJonesWrites said:
It is a great article, Leslie. 🙂
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HMJonesWrites said:
Hi there! Love this article because Facebook often gets me down. I write and create art and I will post about it, and only my mom and a few close friends will support me. I know I’m not a shitty writer. I’ve won awards and am a featured blogger on some big sites, but no one reads my features, or share them. If I post a meme about books being awesome, it gets twenty to 100 shares. If I post about a freebie read I put on Wattpad (and many of my facebook friends are friends because they read my books and liked them), nothing. If I get featured on Huffpost or some such site, nopes. That same hour, some of my closest friends and family members will share ten memes about things they don’t articulate on. And I am left to wonder, is this a social page in terms of what social means? If so, it makes sense. It’s not okay to expound upon important, scary or sad things in social life. It’s rude to talk about your depression (or so I’ve come to believe, since people hate when I bring it up). It’s uncouth to talk about mood disorders. So, I think most really smart dialogue happens off facebook. Like you, I tend to put that stuff on my blogs. And, you know what, other bloggers relate and share the stuff, and it makes me happier. Virtual hugs.
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Leslie said:
It is uncouth to talk about mood disorders. I was so happy when the President at least mentioned doing something about mental health care in this country. No matter what comes of it, he got a conversation started.
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HMJonesWrites said:
I loved that, too. I am very proud that the President does not back down when topics are uncomfortable to others.
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sliceoflife11 said:
I deactivated my FB account last month because it was becoming meaningless to have 500 “friends” but unable to talk to anyone about my depression. I’ve had more support and comfort here so I am grateful for this WordPress world!
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Leslie said:
They should rename “friends” to what it actually is, which is “acquaintances” or “connections”.
Thanks for coming by to comment!
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blahpolar said:
Fuck Facebook 😀
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Leslie said:
lol I follow you on facebook! lolol That’s how I found out I was unsubscribed from your blog. I have no idea how that happened.
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blahpolar said:
Lol!!
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Just Plain Ol' Vic said:
While I don’t have Facebook, I understand what you are saying when it comes to WordPress.
I’ve given up on assuming what will and will not resonate with people. I just write what I want and wherever the chips may fall…
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Leslie said:
I treat WordPress as my journal/group therapy. I just say what I need to say. Whatever happens, happens. I don’t have the energy or the drive to try to increase my readership. I only really need a few people that I like, and I’m pretty happy about that.
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Just Plain Ol' Vic said:
Best way to approach it, good for you!
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La Sabrosona said:
I took a risk and post my blog posts on fb. I usually don’t get likes or comments but people will share my posts. I agree that WP is way more effective for support and connection. It’s so sad to me that family and ‘friends’ on fb don’t seem to give a shit about me but there are very kind bloggers, perfect strangers, that seem to care more.
I give a shit about you Leslie xx
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Leslie said:
Thank you La. I give a shit about you, too
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Drew Sheldon said:
Love it. I’m working on withdrawing from social media myself. It served a purpose for a while, but then it all went bad. Now it just makes my anxiety worse.
So if anything, I’m kind of mad you beat me to this, but I still really enjoyed it.
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Leslie said:
Thank you Drew. I’m glad you liked it.
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dianetharp70 said:
Moist Facefuck posts are FAKE, people post all this rosy crap about their lives. No real bullshit. N of its not that it’s Dramabook. Why air all your dirty laundry & cry when you stupid ass kiss called out on it!?! DUMBFUCKS!! 🙂
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Sandy Sue said:
Candy Crush and Cookie Jam Rock!
I was late joining FB, so I knew what to expect (nothing substantial). But there have been some lovely surprises—reconnecting with folks from high school and having meaningful conversations through messaging, people actually following the links back to my blog or my Etsy site. All of that was a shock to me.
The *noise* of it though is crippling some days. I’ve “unfollowed” lots of Friends (so they still get MY stuff, but I don’t have to listen to the rants). I feel so subversive doing that, which makes it so worthwhile!
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lbeth1950 said:
Thank God, I’venever needed a gun!
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