Here we are again.  Depression Alley.  Depression Lane.

The Pit.

I miss the ultra rapid cycling and the little bit of ultradian cycling that I had going there for a week or so.  Yes, there was depression, but, OH the bursts of energy!  Of course, I’m looking back through rose-colored glasses, but they’re all I have nearby and I don’t have the energy to go look for different, more honest frames.

So pdoc put me on Trintellix.  Figured it was just a matter of time before she got me back on an antidepressant.  I really don’t tolerate them well.  Sometimes they actually make me more depressed.   When she asked me which ones I had taken in the past (before I started seeing her), I listed a bunch and then quit and said ‘All of them’.

Because it’s almost completely true.  All of them.

But, yay, they invented a new one, so I guess we’ll see what happens.

I received a letter from the disability lawyer today confirming the date and time of my hearing and requesting a pre-hearing meeting.  Yes, I’ll be going to that.  They also needed two Social Security forms filled out listing my work history (for the 5th time…it hasn’t changed) and my current medication list (which has changed substantially).  I can’t wait until this is over.  The weight that will be lifted off my shoulders is large.  I will finally be contributing to the household bills again.  It’s not much, but right now hubby is supporting 3 people and it’s getting to him.

And, of course there’s politics.  I realized this morning while I was talking to my therapist, what triggers me so much about Trump.  He speaks to us like we are naughty children.  We’re not allowed to explain ourselves, or why we think the way we think, we’re just wrong.  Always and forever wrong.  Agree or be wrong and exiled.

So very Presidential.

So, that’s it for now.  Hopefully all this makes sense, because I don’t really have the energy to go back and edit it.

Peace and love to you my lovely followers.  This blog wouldn’t be what it is without you.

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