I got a big surprise today and it had nothing to do with mental illness. I’m crusin’ around Facebook, minding everyone else’s business and I start looking at a friends pictures. I do it a lot. But this friend is an old boyfriend’s brother. And I found a picture of the brother. And I got a shock.
We broke up a week before my 27th birthday. That was 24 years ago. I’ve been married for 13 1/2 years. I love my husband very much. But that picture shocked me. It brought back feelings that surprised me. Like hurt, sadness and anger.
Now to say this man did me wrong would be an understatement. And the breakup was emotional torture for me as he managed to play my insecurities so well, that he managed to keep me hooked on the line for 3 YEARS after we broke up.
But, I have worked very hard to put that behind me. I’m gonna guess though that I didn’t do a thorough job. And I’m going to stop here, because I don’t think I want to explore this too deeply yet. My therapist is on vacation for a week and I don’t want to dig myself into a hole I can’t get out of without help.