Pharmacy Tangent

Tags

Belsomra, CVS, insomnia, lunesta, medications, pharmacies, pharmacy, Rite-Aid, Walgreens, Walmart

Last night I thought of a great subject for a blog post.  I didn’t write it down.  I don’t remember what it was.  It’s in that mass of crap I call my brain, but at the moment it is lot to me.  If I think of what it was, I’ll get back to you.

Yesterday I called my pdoc, Dr M., and told her that the Lunesta wasn’t working.  It was doing nothing for me.  So she called in to my pharmacy a 10 day supply of Belsomra. There is a coupon online to get it for free.  I called my pharmacy two hours later to make sure that they got the Rx from Dr M. and they had.  I told them about the coupon and they said just bring it when I pick up and would 4:00 work for me.  I said sure.  I asked her if it is expensive and she said “not very.  It’s $24.47”.  That’s for 10 pills folks. That’s $2.45 per pill.  I want the income that makes that cost seem ‘not very expensive’.  I wasn’t going to print out the coupon.  I was going to leave it for folks who have worse insurance then me or no insurance.  I don’t  like to take samples at the Dr. office for the same reason.  But, damn.  That’s a lot of money!  Especially when you think to a month’s supply.  I’m hoping that she is giving me the before insurance is applied price.

So, I turned my attention to gearing up to pick up the pills.  The only thing that bummed me out was that I was going to have to get dressed, because I was going to have to go IN to the CVS to present my coupon.  Hence, I could not use the drive through which is pajama friendly.

But at 3:30 CVS called to inform me that by the time they got to my prescription they ran out of pills.  Seriously.  I called 2 hours ago.  I didn’t get in line at that point?  Or if they were already out for the day, the girl I spoke to didn’t know that?  So, here I sit at my keyboard after another night of sucko sleep.  I took the Lunesta, but I shouldn’t have bothered.  I was just hoping that it would all of a sudden start to work.  No such luck.

Supposedly, they will have my pills this afternoon.  We’ll see.

This is the time when I really miss the Mom and Pop independent pharmacies.  My dad had one.  I worked for him for years.  With the exact same conditions as I presented to CVS, the first thing my father would do after verifying receipt of the prescription would be to check to make sure that he had enough medication to fill the prescription.  Standard Operating Procedure.   And we knew our customers.  We would be pulling their bag of meds out of the bin before they even got to the counter.  Try getting someone in CVS or Walgreens or Rite-Aid or God forbid Walmart to know who you are.  I fill 10 prescriptions a month all at different times which means I’m in there at least twice a week.  And they don’t know who I am.

Well, this has gone off in a direction I didn’t expect, but I’m gonna just let it be what it is.

And if I think of my great idea from last night, I’ll write another post later.

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So that’s what sleep feels like

Tags

insomnia, medications, seroquel, sleep, triggers

I had nearly forgotten.

I woke once.  But, I got 7 1/4 hours (yes, I’m counting 1/4 hours, it matters) which I haven’t seen in I don’t even know how long.

Pdoc put Seroquel on board yesterday.  This is my second go-round with it, but it worked last time.  I quit it for 2 reasons.  When the new year started and I had to meet a deductible again, it was difficult to afford.  It made me gain weight.  Fast.  A lot.

But, it worked.  Mostly.

Mostly is better than what I’ve been having lately, and I’ll take it.  I’m begging for remission.  I’d pay good money for remission.  But, right now, I’ll take “mostly”, or even “some”.

I mostly just want the bliss of sleep.

Sleep matters.  It relaxes us.  It helps wipe the slate of the racing thoughts.  The hurt of pain of those who haven’t understood or have been downright rude, disrespectful or mean.

But, most of all, it relieves a trigger.  If I can sleep at night, than I don’t worry about whether or not I’ll be able to sleep at night.  I don’t lay awake in anguish wondering why oh why am I awake even though I am exhausted.  I know that the peace of sleep will be mine, if I can just push through this damnable day.

Seroquel sleep, for me, is definitely a druggy sleep.  If hubby banged pots and pans right next to me, I probably wouldn’t wake.  It’s not the sleep I prefer.  But it’s the sleep that I get.

Right now, I’ll take what I can get.

Good morning insomnia

Tags

bipolar, insomnia, medications

8:00pm Take meds.   This is an all meds on deck situation and the handful is daunting to look at.  But, I toss it in my mouth, take a swig of water and swallow the lot.  Time to get comfy and get ready for sleep.

9:00 pm Time for Bob’s Burgers on Adult Swim.  I’m still wide awake.  I have slept with the TV on since my early 20’s.  It soothes me and keeps my mind from running.  I watch/listen with the volume low during the show and then close my eyes during commercials.  My version of meditation

9:30pm Take 2 Ativan (as instructed by pdoc) because obviously Restoril needs help as I am still wide awake.

Fall asleep somewhere around 10:00 pm

1:30 Wide awake…hubby not home from work yet.  Hmmm

Fall back to sleep somewhere around 2:00 am

4:00 am Wide awake.  Start thinking about how good coffee tastes.  Hmm I’m really awake now.  I wonder if my sorority sister got the card I sent her.  How am I supposed to get anything out of therapy if I can’t ever get a good night’s sleep?  I wonder what med pdoc will put me on next.  I wonder how pdoc will react to the 3rd med failure in a row.  I wonder if my ankles will swell today.  Podiatrist appointment tomorrow. Will he do the 2nd plantar fasciitis surgery this week or next?  Toss turn toss turn. Hey, I have a new pimple on my face.  Acne at 45 almost 46. Awesome.  Wonder which med is causing that.   Wonder what time hubby got home.  I’m gonna wake him up tossing and turning like this.

4:05 am I get up.

4:30 am  I sit down with my coffee and open the computer.  The dog is still asleep

This was actually a decent night’s sleep.  5 1/2 hours of sleep with one waking incident.

I take my meds earlier because recently I have been getting up between 4 and 5 am no matter what time I go to sleep.  So, I’m trying to increase my chances of at least a few extra hours.

It’s not really working.

I don’t nap.  I’m afraid if I nap, I’ll mess up my sleep at night.  HAH!  What a freaking joke.

Pdoc is going to have to figure out this insomnia..like..today.  I’m beat.  Racing thoughts screw me up every damn time.  I need something to shut my brain off.  Even if I get 5 1/2 hours of sleep straight through, that would be better.

I’m not asking for miracles here.  Just a little sleep.