So sad
I took our little kitty Leila to the vet yesterday because she was once again sick and peeing on the floors. It appears that she has kidney disease and that she was only going to get worse as time went by.
So I made the decision to put her down. Put her to sleep. Euthanize her.
None of those descriptions feels adequate. Every time I’ve had to do this, the next day I’m crying my eyes out because I feel as though I killed my cat or dog.
And it takes time for me to come around from that.
But, while I’m in the moment, talking to the vet, weighing options, I feel as though I’m making a decision for her that she is counting on me to make, because she isn’t capable. If I don’t do this, life for her is suffering until she finally dies a painful death. I can make it easy. I can make it painless.
And now, the only one who is suffering is me. From sadness. From second guessing. But, it will pass and eventually I will trust in my decision again.
But, not today
morgueticiaatoms said:
Just think of Leila frolicking in fields of catnip with lots of mice to chase. I like to think that’s where Abby and Arsenic are. ❤
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Leslie said:
Thanks Morgue
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Bipolarbrainiac said:
this happened to me. My kitty had fip, a buildup of fluid within internal organs and we had to put her down. She was my everything. Only eight mos old, a mostly black calico called a ‘tortoise shell’ cat or ‘torti.’ My favorite color of cat.
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Leslie said:
oh that sucks.so young!
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blahpolar said:
So sorry Leslie xox
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Leslie said:
Thanks Blah
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Cooking For The Time Challenged said:
So painful to lose a cherished pet!😿
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Just Plain Ol' Vic said:
Aw I am so sorry you had to make that tough decision. *Big hugs* for you!
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Leslie said:
thanks Vic
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anthromichelle said:
It’s better to make the decision out of love (even though it is difficult) than to make a decision out of greed. Pets are a delight (especially kitties!) but if we can’t love them enough to let them go, then that’s just sadness sustained. ❤
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Leslie said:
❤
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tempestjoy said:
tears from my heart
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Leslie said:
Thank you Tempest
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dianetharp70 said:
I know that my words are probably inadequate for your hurt & I’m so sorry. I liken this to when our human family & friends have a terminal (often painful) illness (es). We could force them to continue ‘existing’ for our own selfish & sorrowful reasons, or choose a dignified death with the help of a hospice setting. I’ve said goodbye to my Daddy, PopPop, Grammaw & FIL. Through hospice & have also lost well loved fur babies. What I’m saying ~ go easy on yourself. HUGS!
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Leslie said:
Thank you Diane. We got a sympathy card from our vet yesterday and they had inked her paw and put her little paw print in the card. We also got a certificate from the crematorium. We put the both on “her spot” on the shelves. We were constantly making her get down, but she would always go back. Now it really is her spot.
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Pieces of Bipolar said:
I know how you feel. I’ve been in the same situation. My animals were my children. My first love was the hardest and I didn’t want to let go. I prolonged his life and suffering out of my own personal selfishness, and I vowed I would never do that again. You made the right decision. You made a choice out of love. Now there will be a period of grief. Your kitty was a family member and you are entitled to your tears and your grief. Sending you loads of hugs xxx
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Leslie said:
Thank you Pieces, I appreciate it.
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